You May Find This Harsh But Here Goes…

Please take a minute to read this if you or a loved one is struggling with an unhealed betrayal from a family member, partner, friend, etc.

Let’s make a deal:

If you do nothing differently than you’ve been doing, you’re NOT allowed to:

• Complain about feeling sick
• Complain about feeling sad
• Complain about feeling stuck
• Wonder why you’re unable to trust
• Wonder if you’ll ever be able to love again
• Wonder how to let go
• Complain about how hard it is being hyper vigilant
• Wonder how to sleep better
• Complain about excess weight
• Imagine how you can feel more peaceful
• Wish you could feel less anxious
• Wish you could be more confident
• Get frustrated because you don’t know how lovable you are
• Get upset because you don’t realize how worthy you are
• Wonder why you’re struggling to stick up for yourself because you don’t see how deserving you are
• Understand that it wasn’t about you (even though it was done to you)
• Ponder how on earth do you move forward knowing you’ve made meaning out of your experience
• Wonder how to rewire your mindset to break the toxic thought loop and create more empowering thoughts that lay the groundwork for better results…and so much more.

Deal?

Why am I saying this?

Because while you have every right to stay stuck, it’s preventing you from living the life you deserve. When we’re struggling however, it’s common to receive “small self” benefits that keep us rooted and prevent us from moving forward.

Benefits??

Yep, there are plenty. Here are JUST a few:

• You get to be right
• You get sympathy
• You don’t have to do the hard work of learning to trust again
• You get a powerful story
• It’s hard work
• You get someone to blame…on and on it goes.

Many of you have heard me talk about the difference between resilience and transformation using my house analogy. Healing from betrayal means the house has been leveled and it takes a complete rebuild which I talk about it in my latest TEDx-Do you have Post Betrayal Syndrome?  Don’t get me wrong.You have every right to hang onto your painful story and I’m sure it’s powerful (I have a very powerful story too however, letting go of my story to create a MUCH BETTER STORY is so worth it). When you’re hanging onto your story, you’re also preventing yourself from creating the life you deserve. Your health, freedom and new life is waiting for you but you can only have that if you “face it, feel it, heal it.” That’s what’s waiting for you but you have to do the hardest part which is saying yes to yourself.

Brought to you with some tough love because I believe in you.

Let’s get you feeling better and first, to see what your betrayal left in its wake, take the Post Betrayal Syndrome quiz. Find it here

Dr. Debi
Founder of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute