When trust is shattered, our ability to trust ourselves is shattered too. We ask ourselves questions like: “How did I not see it?” “How did I not know?” For some, we can look back and remember feeling that something wasn’t right, but we couldn’t quite put our finger on it. Others were completely blindsided without the slightest clue that something was off. We’re left questioning others, ourselves, our sanity.
While a common response is to get angry that you didn’t see the signs, that’s really unfair to do to yourself. You were thinking, acting and abiding by the rules of the relationship (spoken or unspoken) and assuming your partner was too.
Wherever you are, regaining trust is important and it’s important to rebuild self-trust too. Rebuilding self-trust is important because it’s one of the ways we can regain confidence in ourselves, in our decision making and in our ability to discern if something is or isn’t in our best interest.
So where’s a good place to start? By strengthening our intuition.
Here are some ideas worth repeating daily in order to strengthen your intuitive muscles.
My intuition tells me what feels right to me. It speaks to me each day.
Intuition is a fantastic tool for self-reflection. It helps me notice things in my environment, and it helps me in my interactions with others.
It helps me see new things or consider new ways of thinking. Intuition is a skill I can use every day. It gives me peace of mind and helps me stay grounded.
I connect with my intuition. I trust my gut instinct.
My intuition guides me through daily challenges and shows me many ways to solve problems.
I recognize the correct answer can take time. Sometimes I think silently, while other times I talk it through out loud to understand.
I always come back to listening to my intuition. I look for opportunities to strengthen my intuitions by taking action.
I take the opportunities to grow or learn. I observe how my intuition works in different situations.
I have access to my intuition at any point or moment, and I can tune in, knowing that if I pay attention to my intuition, I can navigate anything in my path.
I honor my intuition by using it responsibly. I welcome the information it highlights to me. I listen to it and try to follow its guidance.
Today, I choose to trust my intuition. I trust myself to notice events as they happen. I trust myself to stay calm amid unexpected changes. I trust I can find the answer.
Self-Reflection Questions:
- How can I trust my intuition in my relationships?
- When does my intuition feel strongest?
- Where does intuition show up in my physical body?
Dr. Debi
Founder and CEO The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute