The Hidden Impact of Betrayal on Workplace Performance
Why your struggle at work might have nothing to do with work itself
During a recent business podcast interview, I had an interesting conversation about something most business coaches overlook: how betrayal affects workplace performance. The host initially thought we’d be discussing workplace betrayals—being passed over for promotion, having a coworker steal credit for your ideas, or other office politics. But I introduced a concept that shifted the entire conversation.
The betrayal affecting your work performance often happened outside the office entirely.
The Invisible Connection
Here’s what most people don’t realize: a family betrayal, relationship betrayal, or personal betrayal can devastate your professional life, even when you think you’re keeping your personal life separate from work. You might believe you’re doing your best to compartmentalize, but betrayal trauma creates physiological and psychological effects that follow you everywhere.
The Physical Reality of Betrayal
Betrayal isn’t just an emotional experience—it’s a full-body trauma response. Consider these statistics:
- 45% of betrayal survivors develop gut issues
- 47% experience significant weight changes
- Sleep disturbances are nearly universal
- Hypervigilance becomes the default state
- Decision-making capacity diminishes
- Confidence gets shattered
Now imagine trying to perform at your peak with these symptoms.
How Betrayal Sabotages Your Career
The Exhaustion Trap
When you can’t sleep due to betrayal trauma and symptoms of Post Betrayal Syndrome® (PBS®), you show up to work exhausted. Exhausted people don’t make good decisions. They can’t access creativity. They struggle with engagement and productivity—all the things your job demands.
The Trust Dilemma
When the person you trusted most proves untrustworthy, it shatters your ability to trust others. If you’re managing a team, you might find yourself micromanaging because trust feels dangerous. If you’re being managed, you might question every directive, wondering about hidden agendas.
The Physical Discomfort Factor
With gut issues affecting nearly half of those who’ve been betrayed, how comfortable do you feel putting yourself out there? When you’re experiencing weight fluctuations—unable to keep food down initially, then using food for comfort later—how confident do you feel representing your company’s products or services?
The Healthcare Cost
Companies are unknowingly paying healthcare costs for stress-related symptoms, illnesses, and conditions that stem from unhealed betrayal. They might even provide counseling services, but if the therapist isn’t skilled in betrayal recovery, they could inadvertently keep employees stuck in their trauma response.
The Therapy Trap
This brings up a crucial point: traditional therapy can (of course unintentionally) sometimes make betrayal trauma worse. When counselors aren’t specifically trained in betrayal recovery, they often get clients feeling heard, validated, and understood—but not one inch closer to actually healing. This validation can feel so good that people get stuck in what I call “Stage 3” of betrayal recovery, never progressing to the breakthrough stages that lead to genuine healing. (When in Stage 2 however, therapy can be especially helpful and work beautifully with betrayal trauma healing.)
The Business Coach’s Blind Spot
If you’re a business coach working with clients who can’t seem to reach the next level of success, consider this: you might be giving them amazing mindset tools and strategies, but if there’s unhealed betrayal at the root of their struggles, you’re essentially “hacking away at the leaves” instead of addressing the root system.
When betrayal gets properly healed through the five stages of betrayal recovery, everything changes:
- Energy returns
- Health issues resolve
- Confidence rebuilds
- Decision-making sharpens
- Trust capacity restores
- Performance improves dramatically
The Transformation Opportunity
Here’s what’s remarkable about betrayal recovery: when someone moves through all five stages and truly heals, they don’t just return to who they were before the betrayal. They become a stronger, wiser, more confident, and healthier version of themselves than ever existed before.
This isn’t about getting back to baseline—it’s about transformation through adversity.
Moving Forward
If you’re struggling at work and can’t pinpoint why, consider whether unhealed betrayal might be the hidden factor. It could be something that happened decades ago, but until you intentionally and deliberately address it, it will continue affecting your work, health, and relationships.
The good news? It doesn’t have to. Betrayal trauma is healable, and when you move through the proper stages of recovery, you don’t just survive—you thrive.
If you’re a coach or helping professional, understanding betrayal recovery could be the missing piece that helps your clients achieve the breakthroughs they’ve been seeking. Sometimes the greatest professional challenges have deeply personal roots.
Dr. Debi Silber, Founder and CEO of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute and National Forgiveness Day is a WBENC-Certified WBE (Women’s Business Enterprise) is an award-winning speaker, bestselling author, holistic psychologist, a health, mindset and personal development expert. Through a predictable, proven multi-pronged approach, Dr. Debi and her team of Certified PBT Coaches/Practitioners help people heal (physically, mentally and emotionally) from the trauma of shattered trust and betrayal. Get started on your healing here.