Why Your High Performers Are Quiet Quitting: The Hidden Cost of Betrayal
Quiet quitting. You’ve likely heard the term. Maybe you’ve even seen it unfold on your team. Once-enthusiastic employees begin showing up late, participating less, avoiding new responsibilities. They’re not actively disengaged, but the spark is gone.
But what if I told you that beneath that seeming indifference is something deeper?
Betrayal.
When someone experiences a personal betrayal—whether from a partner, a parent, or even a friend—they carry that trauma with them into every area of their lives, including work. Their world is no longer safe. Their brain is constantly scanning for danger. And while they may look “fine,” they’re fighting an invisible battle every minute of the day.
I’ve worked with thousands of people who appeared to have it all together on the outside—executives, entrepreneurs, managers, team leaders. But inside? They were unraveling. Betrayal trauma affects the nervous system, the mind, and the body in ways most people don’t understand. And until it’s healed, it will continue to hijack performance, clarity, and trust.
How It Shows Up at Work
- Reduced focus and productivity
- Sudden irritability or withdrawal
- Decision paralysis
- Missed deadlines, unreturned messages
Not because they don’t care. Because they’re in survival mode.
The Real Problem Isn’t Performance—It’s Pain
Most organizations try to solve disengagement with coaching, incentives, or worse—punishment. But these responses only push the person further into shutdown. They don’t need a performance plan. They need a healing roadmap.
At The PBT® Institute, we use a 5-Stage process to help people move through betrayal and come out stronger on the other side. It’s not therapy. It’s not mindset coaching. It’s transformation, grounded in research and lived experience-specific to betrayal because betrayal is a specific type of trauma that needs a certain way to heal.
When someone heals, they stop quiet quitting—not because you gave them a bonus, but because they got their life back. Their energy returns. Their clarity sharpens. They contribute again, not from obligation, but from purpose.
A Real Story from the Field
I once worked with a sales executive who, after a painful divorce, saw his commissions drop drastically. He couldn’t focus, couldn’t connect with clients, couldn’t bring himself to care about the numbers. He thought he was burned out. His manager thought he needed performance counseling. But the issue wasn’t burnout.
It was betrayal.
Once he moved through the recovery stages, not only did his numbers rebound—they surpassed his previous records. Why? Because he wasn’t just surviving anymore. He was alive. Aligned. Clear.
Here’s What I Want You to Know
Quiet quitting doesn’t mean someone’s lazy or disengaged. It means they’re hurting.
If you have people on your team who seem to be drifting, the most compassionate and effective thing you can do is ask, gently: What’s really going on? Then, give them a real solution.
The Reclaim Program helps people identify where they are stuck and walk the path to recovery. Because when people heal, they stop hiding. And when they stop hiding, they start performing at a level that’s not just productive—it’s powerful. Join me to learn how unhealed betrayals may be showing up in your workplace by clicking here.