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December 19

Behavior & Mindset

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The Phoenix Rising:
Transforming Betrayal into Empowerment in 2024

How long have you been struggling with the aftermath of your betrayal? Days, months, years…decades? If nothing changes, nothing changes.

Your experience:

Doesn’t have to define you.
Doesn’t have to keep you sick, sad and stuck.
Doesn’t have to keep you anxious, uncertain, untrusting, exhausted and so much more.
Doesn’t have to leave you questioning yourself as you wonder if you can ever feel safe and secure again.

Instead, it can be the launchpad to your transformation when you take advantage of a proven, predictable, research based way to heal from ALL of it.

A one-of-a-kind space:

The PBT Institute is such a unique space, built on a rock solid foundation to heal from one of the most painful of the human experiences…betrayal. There truly is nothing like it that exists because it’s based on everything my PhD study proved we need to do and have in order to heal physically, mentally and emotionally from betrayal.

Don’t believe me? While I’ve removed some details to protect the privacy of The PBT® (Post Betrayal Transformation®) Institute and it’s members, here’s something from a fairly new member who is transforming from his experience right before our eyes.

“These are things that I have learned (3+ months in to PBT) that have helped me to get as much as I can out of PBT.

In his words:

1) Don’t hide from the other members or subordinate your trauma. Your trauma is yours; it is equally as severe as anyone else’s because it is yours. I subordinated mine and at first, and I was reluctant to share my journey with other PBT members. Don’t do that. Go ahead and share within this community, because the people that understand and will not judge you and will not make it about them are here in this community. Share on the forums, and in the group calls, and anywhere else you can.

2) Try and get your betrayer into the Rebuild program because without them understanding why they did this to the person they loved and who loved them, any chance of having a continuing relationship with them is diminished. Rebuild helps your betrayer to understand betrayal trauma, and it gets them to examine the why of why they were able to do what they did. And, it teaches them that you have no blame in this. None. So cash in 401K money, cash in some of your kids college fund if you have to, but find a way to get them into Rebuild. Most therapists/marriage counselors just don’t get it. Therapists / marriage counselors that do not specialize in post-betrayal trauma are not going to help you or your betrayer.

3) Listen to the coaches and talk to a few. Buy some extra time with them. Go through the videos to find out who you might gel with.

4) Start examining your limiting beliefs. More than anything else, this is something that kept me stuck.

5) Go into the private sessions really prepared with questions and get to the point of what you want to talk about quickly. They get it. They are there to help.

6) The coaches will tell you this, but you have to separate from the story. I was classic Stage 3, using repeats of the story to punish my betrayer. It just doesn’t help your healing, at least it did not help me. It helped keep me stuck. You may need time to outgrow the story, but the sooner you do, the better you will be able to fully utilize the resources available here.

7) If your betrayer is truly remorseful, then take advantage of that situation to build the kind of life/relationship you need. They SHOULD be going out of their way to help you through this journey. They created this. They should do anything and everything they can do to make it better for you and, possibly for the first time in their life, they should be subordinating their needs to yours.

8) Do the modules in Betrayal to Breakthrough in order, do the homework for each, take a rest, then before progressing onto the next module, do the one you just did again (and again). I found my answers to the homework questions evolved dramatically as I learned more about myself. It is soul wrenching work to answer these questions because they require deep introspection and they reveal culpability of the role you played in this injustice perpetrated upon you. This betrayal was not your fault. You probably did not have it within you to treat someone the way they treated you. However, it is likely you still have lots of room for growth. Every time I repeated a module and re-answered the questions several of the modules ask, I found my self evolving further into someone who not tolerate a relationship where this sort of thing could happen.

Good luck to you.”   – Mike

Let’s sum it up:

You can be tied to your trauma, or to your transformation. The betrayal has already taken so much from you. Let’s make 2024 the year where you finally put it behind you so you can create the health, love, trust, peace and confidence you deserve.

 

Dr. Debi-A Trusted Resource in an Untrusting Niche

Dr. Debi Silber, Founder and CEO of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute and  National Forgiveness Day is a WBENC-Certified WBE (Women’s Business Enterprise), an award-winning speaker, bestselling author, holistic psychologist, a health, mindset and personal development expert who helps (along with her incredibly gifted Certified PBT®-Post Betrayal Transformation® Coaches and Practitioners) a predictable, proven multi-pronged approach to help people heal (physically, mentally and emotionally) from the trauma of betrayal.

About the author 

Dr. Debi

A Trusted Resource in an Untrusting Niche

Dr. Debi Silber, founder of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute https://thepbtinstitute.com is an award-winning speaker, bestselling author, holistic psychologist, a health, mindset and personal development expert who’s created a proven multi-pronged approach to help people heal (physically, mentally and emotionally) from the trauma of betrayal.

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