When you’re suffering from trauma, it’s easy to be consumed by your own pain. For many people, helping others is the furthest thing on their minds. But did you know random acts of kindness have so many benefits for the giver?

I am Dr. Debi Silber and welcome to another insightful episode of A Dose of Dr. Debi.

Today, we will be discussing how helping others can actually help someone struggling to heal from betrayal or a life crisis of any kind. We will also delve into the many ways you can extend a helping hand to someone who needs support. 

Or, listen on your favorite app: iTunes (Apple Podcasts) | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn

In This Episode

  • Understand what happens when you’re dealing with trauma and pain
  • Discover how helping others helps
  • Find out what you can do for others


Hi there, welcome to another Dose of Dr. Debi. Today I just want to talk about giving. I’ve noticed that so often we’re so consumed with our own pain, with our own trauma, with our own crisis. I get it, it’s been a painful experience, something you didn’t see coming happened, and it absolutely throws you. One of the healthiest ways, I found to get out of it, is through giving.

Now, I know you’re thinking; “What the heck Debi! I don’t have anything to give, I’m in so much pain, so much trauma!” But there’s something about it. It doesn’t have to be big. it can be something so small. Sometimes it’s enough to pull you out of your own thoughts and your own pain enough where you just help and support someone else. It doesn’t have to be big at all. It could be a small, little random act of kindness. Maybe you’re paying for someone’s coffee behind you online, you hold the door open for someone, you give someone a compliment. It doesn’t matter. But, when we set an intention, just to do these small random acts of kindness or, or just help somebody in some way, it actually is more helpful for us than it is for the other person.

It boosts the immune system. It gets you out of your painful thoughts, even if just for a while and it can be so helpful. It’s also one of the biggest reasons why we started our charity program we have within The PBT Institute (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute. We have a charity program, and every month, a portion of the first month of everyone’s membership goes towards charity. Every month we also choose a Member of the Month. This is a member who’s working hard, doing the work, showing up. The Member of the Month, decides to which charity those funds go. Or, they can choose to offer a scholarship for someone who otherwise wouldn’t be able to afford the community.

What I love about it is that a member who’s just working hard and healing from their own betrayal, because of their hard work, they’re helping support other causes. We have supported the most amazing charities that I never would have known about if we didn’t institute this program. Charities helping causes like domestic violence, organizations that support women and children, and animals and more. We really have supported so many incredible organizations through this program.

I and specifically ask our members to find charities other than the most common ones. They’re getting so much attention already. Instead, we look to support all those incredible foundations and organizations that you wouldn’t know about otherwise. And it’s been an incredible experience. Or like I said, they can choose to donate a scholarship for a month for someone who otherwise couldn’t afford it.

So it helps them feel so great. Their hard work is allowing for us to support a charity. It makes me feel great because it introduces me to organizations, I never would have known about and our little micro donation is just offering some good there, so it’s good all around. And so, I invite you to consider; what can you do? Whether it’s a random act of kindness, whether it’s supporting a charity, whether it’s just giving a compliment to someone to boost their mood or make them feel better, improve your immune system (because it’s helping us just as much). What can you do to make the world a little bit better? We are in some trying times here. And if everybody just does a little bit to serve the greater good, we’re headed in the right direction.

So I hope this inspires you, just to do something (and it doesn’t have to be big). It can be something small. If this serves and if, if you’re enjoying the podcast please share it with, with your friends, share with anybody who’s struggling to heal from betrayal or a life crisis of any kind.

So many things I can offer you, but one is my book Trust Again, which literally walks you through the Five Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough. They are proven, they are predictable, and the book, walks you through with experiential exercises, so you can move from one stage to the next. To get that along with all the goodies that goes with it, go here.

Thanks so much and we’ll see you next time. Bye bye.


PBT Podcasts

Post Betrayal Syndrome Quiz

PBT Institute Membership Community

Trust Again: Overcoming Betrayal and Regaining Health, Confidence and Happiness

Trust Again Free Gift

Follow Dr. Debi Silber on Facebook | Twitter | Youtube | LinkedIn

225: When Your Betrayal Goes Viral w/ AdaPia d’Errico