Zoe Niklas grew up enduring domestic violence, physical violence, emotional abuse, substance abuse, and sexual abuse. After multiple betrayals and traumatizing incidents involving both her mother and many stepfathers, Zoe harnessed her inner power and was able to break free at age 13. It wasn’t until she was finally taken in by a new family that she was able to embrace the healing power of love and create the life she knew she deserved.
Author of the book Driving In The Dark: A Childhood Memoir, Zoe is the true epitome of taking trauma and turning it into a life of purpose. Today Zoe is here to share her encouraging, insightful and uplifting perspective with you so that you can understand that even your darkest days can be healed through the strength of true love.
Throughout her journey, Zoe has used the power of the written word and theater to regain her memory, health, and happiness. From driving her mother’s car at 11 years old after she had experienced a seizure while running away to commit suicide, to finding hope and healing in the vision of life that she knew she was destined to live, Zoe’s incredible story is one of trial and triumph.
You can make it through the pain you are experiencing. By taking action and taking control of the course of your life, Zoe is here to provide you with inspiration to get you the help that you need and stop your suffering. How does Zoe’s story inspire you to take your biggest crisis and turn it into your greatest gift? Share how you related to Zoe with us in the comments below.
In This Episode:
“They never dissed me or said I was tarnished by my background. They loved me, and that love made me love myself.” (14:51)
“I heard a voice as clear as I am sitting talking to you, and it was like a man speaking in a megaphone in my right ear. And that voice said “get help now”.” (17:33)
“That’s why I say that I am the luckiest person in the world because I knew what I wanted and I followed the way to get there.” (21:47)
“Never stop, never stop trying to save yourself, don’t stop, keep going.” (24:39)
“I am sure there are kids out there that are just as hurt as I was, and I made it, and so I want them to know that it’s okay. You can hurt and you can do all of those things, but you can make it.” (27:39)
Have you ever heard of the DISC assessment? Midori Verity is one of the most innovative and successful marriage and communication coaches out there, who helps couples elevate their relationships by improving communication. Midori uses the DISC assessment to identify personality traits and help her clients adapt and adjust so that they can have a more peaceful and harmonious relationship, and is here today to share her knowledge with you.
If you are feeling unheard in your relationship or need help connecting, Midori’s insight into the four personality types can help you press the reset button and start to develop more support and synergy in your relationship. The DISC assessment can help you understand why your relationship is in trouble, assess what you need to do to move forward, and even help you when making decisions in the future.
By learning about what makes your personality type tick, you can better prepare yourself to find the job or relationship that suits you perfectly, and who doesn’t want that? When it comes to relationships, it is all about the Platinum Rule, which helps you speak the language your partner speaks so that you know you are both being heard and understood.
Are you ready to learn about you and your partner’s personality types and harness that information to start speaking each other’s languages? Share where you fall on the DISC assessment with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“We all have a different language, we all have a different behavioral style and personality type, and when we can match that, we are going to be listened to more, we are going to be received more, and our conversations are going to be much more successful.” (3:37)
“When you go through challenges in life, whether it’s in your relationship or outside of your relationship it doesn’t matter, but when we go through challenges and we feel stressed, we react differently, that’s why this is so important.” (11:02)
“In general, our natural graphs stay about the same, they will not change that much. But, we can learn techniques to help us improve in certain areas so that we can acquiesce in relationships.” (27:15)
“You have to kind of get to know what you are. I recommend for everybody to take a DISC assessment, even if you did before, take it again. And think about it from a relationship standpoint.” (28:29)
“The way that we see the world, is not how others see the world. So if you are bashing heads with your partner, often just some tweaks in the way that you understand them and the way you respond to them will diffuse situations.” (30:16)
Holly Bertone was on the highest levels of financial management when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. After beginning the journey to recovery while becoming newly engaged, she was diagnosed with the autoimmune disease Hashimoto’s less than a year later. While she expected support from the company that she had worked so hard for, Holly was met with accusations and dismissal.
The experience of betrayal and bullying in the workplace lead Holly to write her book, Thriving in the Workplace with Autoimmune Disease: Know Your Rights, Resolve Conflict and Reduce Stress. Since then Holly has become a sought after speaker, wellness expert, Amazon bestseller and President and CEO of Pink Fortitude.
Today Holly is here to share her story of overcoming medical adversity, lessons learned from betrayal in the workplace, and how you can thrive in gratitude despite your past experiences. If you have ever experienced workplace betrayal, this is episode is filled with practical information that you can’t miss.
Holly literally wrote the book on your rights and responsibilities in the workplace when dealing with an autoimmune disease or another workplace betrayal, and is passionate about sharing her resources with everyone so that you own your place in the workplace.
Have you experienced workplace betrayal? Share your story with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“I just felt this peace that breast cancer was my gift and that this whole life transition was my new gift in life.” (5:45)
“An autoimmune disease is, as they say, the gift that keeps on giving. Cancer kicked my butt temporarily, autoimmune disease was a much bigger, longer journey of kicking my butt.” (8:24)
“You’re supposed to be in a management position, you are supposed to be supporting me, and I have legal documentation telling me that you are supposed to be doing this.” (14:09)
“There are not a lot of resources out there. I tried to find what I could, and its like navigating a sea without a map, you are just in this ocean and you can’t even see land at this point.” (19:20)
“I guess I kind of divorced myself from that connection and said ‘I need to stand on my own two feet during this process’. And I need to be my own advocate and I need to figure things out myself.” (23:06)
“I would not wish my journey on anyone, but I am so grateful that I have been able to go through it.” (24:55)
Michelle Dickinson is a passionate potter who has worked in the pharmaceutical industry for eighteen years and is the author of the memoir Breaking Into My Life, a rare glimpse into a young girl’s experience living with and loving her bipolar mother. Michelle has overcome years of neglect and confusion surrounding her mother’s mental condition and is here today to share how she came out on the other side a vehement advocate for mental health and ending the stigma.
Through her self-work and internal healing, Michelle has reached a place of forgiveness and determination to hold space in the mental health community and remove the stigma for those suffering and their caretakers. By transforming her experiences with her mother’s illness from harmful to empowering, Michelle is making massive strides when it comes to providing help to those who need it.
Michelle wants you to be courageous and take the first step towards healing, instead of pretending that what inhibits you doesn’t exist. Out of your greatest messes comes your message, and this episode is all about transformation and gaining the confidence to choose the life you want for yourself instead of the life you know.
You are not your past, and from this moment forward you have the power to create what you want for yourself and claim it as your own. Michelle is here to provide advice, hope and inspire your perseverance so that you too can triumph over what ails you.
How has Michelle inspired you to take your painful experience and turn it into something positive? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“Our needs were always on the back burner. If I had a bad day at school or there was an upset with a girlfriend, that didn’t matter. What mattered was if she had what she needs. So I quickly learned how to hide my own needs and put whatever I needed on the shelf and really just focus on her.” (6:07)
“She kind of gave me permission to create that boundary and that space and love myself and take care of myself, when no one had ever done that for me.” (12:00)
“Self-care wasn’t something that I grew up learning. I was having to learn how to create boundaries and care for myself, this was an act of caring for myself by doing that.” (17:06)
“You don’t realize how these experiences from your youth and your relationship with your mother alter what you believe you can and cannot do in your life.” (21:52)
“I would want every child to know that they are perfect, whole and complete, just as they are, and that their potential is limitless. ” (23:57)
I can hardly believe that we have reached the 100 episode milestone, and I know that you have learned a lot throughout the amazing array of guests I have been lucky enough to talk to. To celebrate I wanted to share with you the seven greatest lessons I have learned in the past 99 episodes, and provide you with a recap of some of the experts that may be worth revisiting depending on your topic of interest.
My goal is to provide you with an array of tools and amazing insights so that you can take off your rose-colored glasses and start moving the needle on your healing journey. Everything from divorce to forgiveness and essential oils has been covered in the past 100 episodes, and I am here today to highlight those that are going to help you live a confident and resilient life regardless of your betrayal history.
If you are ready to heal from your betrayal physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, I am here to help you onto the path of true happiness. No matter what your betrayal you can come out on the other side, and it is through these seven greatest lessons that you can empower yourself to do so.
Are you ready to rediscover the fire within yourself and find the lesson you need to learn in order to heal? Share some of your favorite episodes with us and let us know what topics you want to hear more of in the comments below.
In This Episode
“Those were the episodes that I feel really shared the depth and importance of relationships and possibility, so if any of those resonated with you, go on in and listen to those again, you will get so much more out of it.” (17:49)
“While it may be impossible to eliminate all of the stress from your life, it is possible to train your brain to handle stressful situations with more grace and ease by employing tools such as regarding your mind before a stressful event and replenishing yourself afterward, you can build up your capacity to cope with the challenges of life.” (28:28)
“There are so many different tools that we can use to heal and that is why hopefully I want you to listen and relisten so that you can find the tools that work for you.” (31:57)
“Going through a betrayal impacts every part of us including physically, mentally and emotionally, and spiritually. When we are not able to heal and release the trauma, it can build up inside our cellular memory and cause illness, disease and unnecessary stress. It is only by treating our symptoms in a holistic way that we can begin to understand the mind-body connection.” (42:49)
“If you feel as though you wear a shield of protective armor that is hiding a fraud, its time to take off your battle uniform and live a life full of authenticity and happiness.” (1:09:22)
Darrah Brustein is equal parts teacher, connector and founder of Life By Design, Not By Default. After multiple betrayals in the business world including losing her job, embezzlement from her partners, and the lack of faith from her mother, Darrah came out the other side as the embodiment of the power of persistence.
Now a prolific writer, co-host of a YouTube channel with Deepak Chopra and a profound speaker, Darrah is here to share how you can build a life of your own design. Darrah is passionate about sharing everything that got her to where she is today, from the benefits of business betrayals to embracing your failures and what she learned as a result. After being burned by the people she trusted and a system she believed in, Darrah harnessed her motivation to move forward and leaned into her intuition, and you can too.
The true manifestation of effortlessness, Darrah wants to help you define a life that defines success for yourself, builds a career to help you fund it and attracts a network to support it. No matter the challenges you have faced, success is often right around the corner from failure, but if you stop at failure you will never reach it. Darrah is here to inspire you to create your zone of genius and keep moving forward while embracing the lessons the universe wants you to learn.
Can you relate to Darrah’s story of business betrayal? Head on over to the episode page and let us know what has kept you going or held you back in the comments below.
In This Episode
“I realized that the narrative that I had been taught, and almost spoon-fed my whole life, of you know, kind of the American dream. Go to school, get good grades, get a job, get the house, and so on, happily ever after, was not working for me in any way, shape or form.” (7:22)
“Instead of doing the thing I did the first time and picking the thing that I already knew I was passionate about and trying to make that an enjoyable and fulfilling career, which didn’t work. Let me try and reverse engineer this and try and find things that I am excited about doing and help me feel motivated and energized on a day to day basis and then become excited about the product or service as a result.” (9:09)
“It all came back down to the reputation and that we were building and building and doing it the right with integrity, and someone ripped that out from under us.” (16:57)
“I am a deep believer in where the current is taking you and where momentum exists organically is the cue that you are on the right path. And when it is not, and you are white-knuckling it and when you are swimming upstream is when you are not.” (19:18)
“Look for the evidence in your past to find even a tiny example of when things clicked and worked and how that felt, and let that even be a tiny example for you of how you can build more of that.” (26:05)
Joshua A. Shea is a recovering pornography addict who is here to shed a different light on the topic of porn addiction and what goes on inside the mind of a porn addict. Joshua’s 20-year addiction came to a head when he pulled himself off his bipolar medication and engaged an underage girl in an online chat room. Now sober, out of prison and still living with his wife and children, Joshua is here to explain the real motivating factors behind his own personal porn addiction.
For Joshua, it was never about the pornography or the alcohol but instead about the control he gained from using this material. If you have been hurt by someone’s porn usage or want to gain a better understanding of the decision-making process of a pornography addict, this is an episode you need to listen too.
Despite the fact that many adults look at pornography, it is a topic that nobody wants to talk about. Joshua wants to open up that conversation and shine a light on the problem of pornography addiction to help others who may be struggling as well. If you are the spouse or the partner of a pornography addict, Joshua wants to make sure that you know that it has nothing to do with you and provide you with insights to help you understand that there is no stereotypical addict.
Do you or somebody that you love struggle with pornography addiction? Share this episode with them and let us know how transformation has proven possible for you in the comments below.
In This Episode
“Pornography and alcohol, they both allowed me to escape someplace else. They allowed me to go somewhere where I was in control. And that ultimately is what my pornography addiction specifically was about my entire life.” (5:07)
“I think I even made the joke back then that all of these different people would only ever meet at my funeral, and they would all have very different stories to share with one another because they all knew different versions of me.” (10:46)
“Despite the magazine falling apart, despite the fact that I was drinking more and my relationships with my family were falling apart, life was crumbling, and the one place that I could exert control was in the middle of the night in these chat rooms.” (17:10)
“I don’t blame the addiction for what I did. The addiction did make me get out of control, it did make me not recognize cause and effect and not recognize what could happen and make poor decisions. However, I made the very poor decision to pull myself off my bipolar medication.” (21:41)
“Despite the fact that the vast majority of people are looking at pornography, everybody wants to pretend that they don’t. And if everybody pretends that they don’t look at pornography, I am not even saying addicts, but if everybody pretends that they don’t look at pornography, how can we even begin to have conversations about pornography addiction?” (29:12)
After a betrayal, it is common to feel held by your grief and trauma, unable to break free and live your best life. Alyson Franz realized this, and after being trained in comprehensive energy psychology she created the Paradime Shift LLC to help people transform their lives with individualized programs to achieve major personal and life changes. She put the concept of life transformation officially on the map in Rhode Island and is here today to share exciting ways to move forward from the pain and grief of trauma.
Alyson helps her clients find an answer on how to heal from grief when ‘giving it time’ just isn’t working for you. She is here to help all of us realize the clue that there is something more to life, and learn how to release our trauma so we can walk around without the heavy burden of it day after day.
Today Alyson is sharing her 4 Step Process for Healing from Grief and Trauma, her favorite forms of energy therapy, and the nine most typical barriers to healing trauma that she sees regularly. Plus, she is exploring the relationship she has with her mentor, dismissing myths about grief and trauma, and so much more.
If you are ready to transform your life and stop being burdened by the pain and grief of trauma, this episode is for you. Have you tried any of the energy therapy techniques Alyson describes today? Let us know in the comments below!
In This Episode
“Once I started to figure out how to heal my grief, I started to realize that what was underneath it was a lot of trauma from childhood” (2:47)
“That just got me started thinking about healing and life and what is meant to be in a whole different way. And I hit the ground running and I’ve been running ever since” (7:32)
“I could just feel literally an internal shift that I wanted and that’s when I went, I need more of this stuff in my life. And I also realized I needed to become proficient in it so that I could share it with the world” (10:33)
“I think we just need to be able to get out of our own way and look at guilt for the lack of value that it really has.” (14:06)
“Even though it might feel overwhelming, we are energetic beings, and we have ways to get to the root of the problem and release it” (19:10)
“I believe that everything is meant to move us forward in life. So once you heal from this, once you do these first three steps you are going to be better than you have ever been before” (30:29)
Dr. Sheri Keffer‘s life came screeching to a halt when she found out that her new marriage to a pastor was filled with pornography, affairs, and prostitutes. Now a clinical sex addiction therapist and EMDR practitioner in addition to her audience of over two million people per week on her regular co-hosting gig at New Life Live, Dr. Sheri knows what it takes to heal and helps others realize that they are not alone, not crazy and can heal after sexual betrayal.
The way men and women experience sexual betrayal is very different, and it is only by engaging in a total truth-telling process that you can work to heal yourself and your relationship. The physical and mental symptoms of betrayal can seem overwhelming, but when you equip yourself with the right boundaries and ability to see the truth for what it is, healing is possible.
The process of rebuilding starts with you first, and it is Dr. Sheri’s mission is to give betrayed partners a roadmap to healing and recovery. With tools like EMDR and therapy, Dr. Sheri is here to tell you that you are worth fighting for and it is possible to rebuild with or without the person that hurt you as long as you have the truth first.
Have you or a loved one experienced sexual betrayal? How do you relate to Dr. Sheri’s story of deception and healing through exposing the truth? Share your story with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“All of it hurts, but the more intimate, the more emotional, the longer that relationship is, the more compulsive the sexual behavior is. It is harmful to us.” (4:59)
“At some point, I had to wake up from this nightmare I was living in that I really didn’t want to look at.” (10:34)
“A partner who is betrayed needs two things that are critical to heal, like two pillars, they need safety and they need the truth. And until they have those two things, a betrayed partner cannot settle into their body.” (19:17)
“The first step of recovery, whether you are staying with your partner or not, is recovery for yourself. Because you can’t fight for that relationship if you are lying flat on the ground.” (28:32)
“We have to be very proactive in getting in front of good therapists that know what they are doing with sexual deception.” (28:10)
Dr. Meg Haworth is a wellness expert, nutritional celebrity chef, transpersonal psychologist and best-selling author who is proof that it truly is possible to heal from anything. Having faced over a dozen chronic illnesses, survived childhood sexual abuse and getting struck by lightning, Dr. Meg focuses on holistic wellness solutions for those who have developed a chronic illness as a result of their adverse experiences.
Going through a betrayal impacts every part of us, including physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. When we are not able to heal and release this trauma it can build up inside of our cellular memory and cause illness, disease and unnecessary stress. It is only by treating our symptoms in a holistic way that we can begin to understand the mind-body connection, and Dr. Meg is here to shine a light on your environment’s ability to alter the core of your being.
Chronic illness as a result of betrayal is something that many struggle with, but it doesn’t have to be that way. If you are ready to heal your mind, body, and soul as one whole entity, Dr. Meg is here to help you find your enlightening power of choice and get to the next level of your healing journey.
Have your past experiences resulted in a physical, mental or emotional illness? Share how you are working to release the past and move forward holistically in the comments below.
In This Episode
“Most medical practitioners, they are always looking for what is wrong with you physically and how do we help that physically. But it was really the mental, emotional and spiritual issues that were beneath it all that were the biggest thing that unlocked the mystery of my own health.” (3:23)
“I knew I was spinning in anxiety all the time, I knew that I was a wreck on the inside and that the smiling outside didn’t match the inside, I knew all of that. But I didn’t understand how it was wearing away at my physical body.” (7:28)
“That question in that moment really changed the course of my life, because then I decided that I needed to take my healing into my own hands and look at some alternatives or complementary care that might be able to help me actually heal.” (12:14)
“You’re looking at the connection between the mind, the body and the spirit, and the mental emotional and spiritual are really at the core of the experience.” (20:18)
According to recent data, there are over 152 million Americans who are victims of narcissistic abuse. Narcissists can entangle themselves in your life and can cause a severe amount of trauma and betrayal. Narcissism and betrayal can lead to the perfect storm, and it is only by recognizing the red flags of a narcissist that you can set boundaries and heal yourself so that you don’t become a narcissist magnet.
Tracy Malone is the founder of Narcissist Abuse Support, a global resource that helps victims in over 145 countries heal after a narcissistic relationship. Whether it is a romantic partner, family member, friend or co-worker, narcissists thrive on getting what they can out of people, which is why the pain from this type of betrayal can run so deep.
Betrayal is just part of the package when dealing with a narcissist, and the sad truth is that they will never change. By putting language towards narcissistic tendencies, understanding the stages and tendencies of a narcissist, and not sharing your shame story unless someone deserves it, you can learn how to protect yourself from becoming vulnerable to a narcissists’ game.
If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, wanting to heal and get to the stage of ‘no-contact’ or are looking to understand the mind of a narcissist, Tracy is here to shine a light on a topic so many struggle with.
Are you ready to break the pattern of narcissistic abuse and learn your own internal lessons so that you stop attracting or falling prey to narcissistic tendencies? Share your experience with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“They know they have got you. All they have to do is mold themselves to what you are telling them you are looking for, and they’ve hooked you! It’s a green flag to them.” (6:07)
“Most people, sadly, get discarded, or leave a narcissist seven times before they are able to go no contact and never have to deal with them again.” (16:10)
“[Narcissists] can’t really change themselves. They can go back into that love bombing stage, and they can act, but they are never ever going to be able to feel empathy.” (18:00)
“Abandonment is not just ‘daddy left when I was six’. It’s someone not being there for you emotionally who is in your life. So if you have been with a narcissistic partner, they have emotionally left you and you feel abandoned.” (21:51)
“If you don’t do the work, you’re going to hook another narcissist, you have to learn this lesson before you go out there, so let yourself have time to heal.” (30:39)
So often we think people who are happy have had easy lives, and Shari Alyse is living proof that despite hardships you can still become a joy magnet. Co-founder of The Wellness Universe, Soul Ventures and an internationally recognized speaker, truth coach, author and blogger, Shari radiates joy and dedicates her life to spreading the message of finding the love that exists within.
After sexual molestation at age seven, resulting in her testifying on the stand and eventually sentencing her abuser to prison, Shari had no idea that her trauma was still following her years later. It wasn’t until a life-changing trip that she realized the joy she had been searching for all along was inside of each and every human being. Now Shari is passionate about reigniting the light in everyone and bringing joy back to people’s lives after they feel like they lost it for good.
Joy is at the heart of who we all are as people, it is your choice to tap into it and share your gift with the world. Even when something rocks your world, if you are able to stand up for yourself and fight for your inner power, you too can find never-ending joy.
In what ways does Shari inspire you to bring more joy into your life? Share with us in the comments below.
In This Episode
“You can make a difference every single day in everything you do with the small things.” (8:51)
“What I was told during this time was that I was brave and courageous and strong and I saved all these girls, but I didn’t feel brave and courageous and strong, I felt like a girl that had been hurt and didn’t understand why this had happened to her.” (13:37)
“This is about you knowing that nothing on the outside matters. It doesn’t matter what your financial status is, and it doesn’t matter what things you have or what your relationship is, joy is something that we all just have and its whether we choose to tap into it or not.” (16:55)
“I am doing people a disservice when I do not share with people my truth. And my truth is that I do struggle, and that I do have challenges, but I have learned the tools and how to navigate it, to help myself not sit in that space for long.” (22:33)
“I know this sucks, I know that it’s hard, but I also know that because of who we are and what we were built to be, that we are and you are okay.” (29:32)